Darling

My Darling
When you look in the mirror and all you see is ugly
I see Beauty
My Sweetheart
When he yells at you and tells you that you are worthless, and you believe him.
I see Worth
My Beloved
When you cut yourself to feel
I see your Heart
My Child
When you cry yourself to sleep
I see You


You are worth more than words can express
My Love goes beyond your sins and beyond your suffering
I can feel your heart beat
I can count the hairs on your head
I find you worthy
I find you beautiful
I find you gorgeous
Let me define you
Let me become your mirror
Let me Love you

I was just thinking the other day about how we let ourselves lose track of the fact that there is a God who sees us as beautiful. Women and especially young women are easily tricked into believing that they are only worth how much a man decides they are. They are easily swayed into believing that they can not be strong and still be attractive. But God has a different perspective on things. He sees people for who they really are... He sees their faults and He heals the wounds that have been caused by hurt and hate people have pinned on each other. It breaks my heart to see young women who can barely look you in the face because of their pain and shame they feel for themselves. It breaks my heart to hear young girls talking about how they can't wait to get older so they can get plastic surgery to fix their "flaws." It breaks my heart to hear men yelling at their girlfriends or spouses and tearing them down, and the women just taking it and not finding their worth. It breaks my heart to see the scars that some girls and women have inflicted upon themselves in order to feel.. or to release their hurt... There so many young women out there who are so broken... the world takes them apart piece by piece labeling their "flaws," and telling them that they aren't beautiful. The world tells them that in order to be beautiful they need to wear certain clothes or weigh less... But God sees them each as beautiful, lovely, gorgeous, and pretty women. I pray that they find their worth in God.

8 years

In 6 days it will be the 8 year anniversary of my mother passing away. To say that I miss her very much, would be an understatement. I find that I think about her randomly throughout each day. I think about how she would have loved to work here at Cannon Beach, how she would of thought a joke that I heard during the day was funny, or how she would have liked my friends. I think about how she loved people, she was shy but loving . I think about how she loved to cook for others and how she loved to put a smile on her kids faces. I think about how she loved little babies and how she would have adored my best friends son. I think about how she would be proud of all her kids. I miss her but I do know she's happy.
My mother was a strong, smart, and beautiful women. She loved God with all her heart, she loved her family with all her heart. I pray that I can reflect her in my actions and in my words. I pray that when I have a family that I will be the kind of mother to my children as she was to me.